The girl you want is usually the one you see as a good catch. A girl who perhaps is considered above your level.
Men have two types of women in their life. The women they want, the women they can get. Over time the women they want become the women they’ll never get, and the women they can get become the women they want.
Sadly this is nothing more than a psychological trick that we play on ourselves.
This is something called the choice supportive bias. We attain positive attributes to the option that we picked, and begin to negatively describe the ones we didn’t pick in order to frame a decision to appear as good as possible.
This occurs with the women in our lives, but with one difference, we don’t have a full range of choice.
The woman you want simply doesn’t want you. Therefore you’re forced to make the women who want you the women you want. But it’s all a way of masking our true desires.
This is why self-proclaimed happily married men watch porn on a daily basis, even though they have a wife who will willingly sleep with them. It’s also why so many men pretend that the most beautiful women are horrible people, which as we know simply isn’t true.
Beauty doesn’t equal bad qualities, most men just frame it that way in order to justify their current partner who isn’t actually what they want.
What Does All Of This Mean?
It means that any man can get the woman he wants, it just depends on how much you’re willing to give.
Attracting the most beautiful girl is tough. She can have any man she wants. This is why she’s very selective and the majority of men get ignored.
Too many men believe they can get a certain girl by looking at her pictures, thinking about her and fantasizing about certain scenarios.
But the truth is, you get further and further away each time you do this. If you truly want to get her, then you have to become better than her.
Instead of sitting there and admiring how great she is, put in the work until she admires how great you are.
Turn the tables on the situation. There’s men out there who are married to beautiful women who rejected them endlessly to begin with.
But due to them not giving up, they eventually got the girl they wanted, or another girl of a similar level.
Wishing gets you nowhere. You can look at pretty girls all day, but this won’t change a thing. The men landing the most sought after women are those aiming to become better than them.
Becoming Better Than The Woman You Want
If the girl you want is operating above your perceived level right now, then there’s only one thing to do. Upgrade yourself until you’re above her level.
The one thing that you have to remember is…For every girl that you think is perfect, there’s a man out there that she thinks is perfect.
Your aim should be, to become that man.
Sadly this is where the choice supportive bias takes over.
Men start to opt for the women who are easily accessible because it’s not a challenge, then they frame this decision and make their partner appear better than she really is.
The average woman that you settle down with could be moody, boring and angry all the time, but you’d still say that the most beautiful women have terrible personalities in order to protect yourself.
An ugly woman is no guarantee for a good person. There’s plenty of unattractive people who have a personality to match. Just as there’s beautiful women who work for charities and have great personalities.
The choice supportive bias is an excuse for mediocrity. It happens in everything we do, but it’s evident all around the world when it comes to women.
You see a man laughing and joking with his wife, then a model walks past and his wife becomes invisible.
This is the women he always wanted to be with, but his brain steps in to save him and draws the conclusion that she’s high maintenance and has no sense of humor. If it didn’t we’d probably spend all day crying about the women we don’t have.
No one likes to live with regret, even if it is masked with a lie. If there’s a woman you want, leave nothing on the table in the present. Do whatever you can to gain more value than her.
Put yourself in her position, where you’re the sought after individual and she’s chasing you.
“Don’t chase what you want, simply upgrade yourself until what you want chases you”.
Why stare all day at your perfect woman when you could touch her, kiss her and call her yours in reality?
It just seems insane to settle for a image on a screen when the real thing is possible. It just takes a lot of work, and even more work than that the higher you want to go.
For example some of you may see a Victoria Secret model as your perfect woman. I’m not going to tell you that it isn’t possible, because it is. But the truth is, you’re going to be working for 18 hours a day on your body, your success and who you are as a person in order to even get your foot in the door.
It may take 10 years of hard work to even be in a position to say hello to her. It may take 10 years to gain access to the same venue as she’s at. It may take 10 years for your name to grow big enough for her to take notice of you.
The choice is yours, just don’t cheat on your wife or treat her badly in the future because she was nothing more than a safety net as you ran out of options, this isn’t fair.
Life isn’t fair, we’re not born with everything we want. But this should excite you, it means that the realest individuals can have the best of everything, while all of the talkers and slackers get what they deserve.